Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Superwoman

So I knew today would be an AWESOME day when...

1) I got around 5 hours of sleep last night and my eyes are bloodshot
2) Olivia cried during most of the 20 minute drive to her preschool this morning
3) I looked down and the 'check engine' light was on in my car

But there's still hope for the rest of today, right? (Right?!!)

On a more positive note, I found this song online the other day and thought it had a pretty cool message so I thought I'd share...


Superwoman by Alicia Keys

Everywhere I'm turning

Nothing seems complete

I stand up and I'm searching

For the better part of me

I hang my head from sorrow

Slave to humanity

I wear it on my shoulders

Gotta find the strength in me


Cause I am a Superwoman

Yes I am

Yes she is

Still when I'm a mess

I still put on a vest

With an S on my chest

Oh yes

I'm a Superwoman


For all the mothers fighting

For better days to come

And all my women, all my women sitting here trying

To come home before the sun

And all my sisters

Coming together

Say yes I will

Yes I can


Cause I am a Superwoman

Yes I am

Yes she is

Still when I'm a mess

I still put on a vest

With an S on my chest

Oh yes

I'm a Superwoman


When I'm breaking down

And I can't be found

And I start to get weak

Cause no one knows

Me underneath these clothes

But I can fly

We can fly, Oooohh


Cause I am a Superwoman

Yes I am

Yes she is

Still when I'm a mess

I still put on a vest

With an S on my chest

Oh yes

I'm a Superwoman

Oh yes

You are a Superwoman

Monday, December 29, 2008

Wanting Less

Seems like a simple concept, but oh so hard to do. I was explaining to my husband the other day that I realized if I just started wanting less then I wouldn’t torture myself about all the things I don’t have. I wouldn’t be bothered by all the thoughts of when I get this, or when I get that, it will make me happy. To be honest, I’ve always been a little materialistic—I like things. Things for my house, things to wear, things for my kids; I like getting new stuff. Don’t we all? But at what point will it be enough to really satisfy me? That’s when I decided that that time will never come. I will never be completely satisfied with things. I’ll always want more; my paycheck will never be enough.

I look back to when my husband and I had our very first apartment---we had nothing. I’ll spare you the details of our shabbily furnished apartment, but trust me when I say we owned not one nice thing. So I compare that to now and how far we’ve come, but it still doesn’t lessen the urge of wanting so much more. New floors, new paint job, new bedroom furniture, a new car, a landscaping overhaul in the backyard….I could go on and on. But instead I’ll get to my point: If I wanted less, I could focus on what I have and be oh so grateful for it. I have been blessed a thousand times over in my life. Not only that, but I have blessings that some women will never receive—a supportive family, children of my own, a loving {albeit annoying} husband, the chance to finish my college education, a job I like, and the opportunity to start a meaningful career--but for some reason I choose to focus on the fact that I drive an old car, my kitchen doesn’t look like the ones in magazines, and my bedroom furniture is worn out.

So I guess my real question is can it be done? Is it possible to live in this country the way it is today, and not constantly worry about more and better while taking for granted what we already have?

Monday, December 22, 2008

Nope, Not Me!




I have NOT been watching MckMama’s blog since 7AM so that I can be one of the first on the list this morning, because I’m tired of always being like 300th………NO, that would be a little too obsessive.

I do NOT still have Christmas shopping to do that will probably get done on Wednesday {better known as Christmas Eve}……not me! That would be way too stressful.

I did NOT go pick out my own Christmas present, order it, pay for it, and then hand my husband the pick up receipt……that would be a little too controlling, you think? Yeah, I DIDN’T do that. {Just like I later DIDN’T tell Alexandria what I would really like her and Olivia to get me…..in case daddy asks}

I am NOT already thinking of breaking into my lunch (at 8AM) because I skipped breakfast and dinner last night….nope, that would be silly to eat a chicken pot pie this early in the day……besides what would I eat later for lunch?......yeah, that’s why I’m NOT thinking of doing something like that.

Enjoy more "Not Me Monday" postings at MckMama's blog!

Sunday, December 21, 2008

My 40th post!

In honor of my 40th post {and because I’m bored out of my mind right now} I’ve decided to list 20 things I hate and 20 things I love……

I LOVE…..

1. cheeseburgers and fries
2. my family! {u like how they come second to cheeseburgers?}
3. eating out
4. Christmas time
5. Summer nights
6. LOST (television series)
7. having BBQ’s in the summer
8. Music
9. the fact that I played the flute in jr high/high school band
10. to read
11. Papa Rollo’s pizza
12. the snuggly feel and smell of a newborn baby
13. to sleep…love it.
14. Britney’s new song Womanizer
15. FOOD
16. my career field
17. Lifetime movies
18. the Twilight series written by Stephanie Meyer!
19. having children
20. the peaceful feeling I get when I’m able to surrender………
That one is worth repeating........the peaceful feeling I get when I'm able to surrender...

I HATE….

1. drivers who don’t know how to DRIVE
2. the fact that there are way too many people who get confused at 4-way stops
3. when people are fake
4. surprises and secrets
5.not being in control
6. cheesy commercials
7. being told what to do
8. getting up early in the morning! Yuck.
9. the fact that men drive women crazy and then have the nerve to call them psycho……bastards
10. being micro managed
11. people who are critical of things like tattoos, piercings, slang words--get over it!
12. people who are rude for no apparent reason
13. being the center of attention
14. people who smile at me but don’t really mean it
15. that I can’t control my blushing. It happens at random and when I’m not even embarrassed.
16. when I’m really tired and I get woken up
17. when people make a billion wrong assumptions about me!!
18. running out of hot water in the middle of a shower
19. cleaning up after an indoor pet that isn’t house trained yet!
20. anxiety…….such a bummer

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

A Day Late? Not Me!



My internet was down at work yesterday and when I got home I was too tired to get on the computer, but since I already had the darn thing written, I'm posting it!

First of all, I am NOT sitting here falling asleep at my desk…..literally.

I did NOT groan out loud when I thought a client was being brought in for me to see…….I would NEVER do that……I love my job even when I’m soooooooo sleepy.

I did NOT see someone I know in the grocery store last week and then proceed to go out of my way to avoid this person…. {who am I kidding? this happens at least once a week.}

While out shopping this weekend I did NOT get so tired of the gum in my mouth and so frustrated that I couldn’t find any paper or a trashcan to get rid of it, that I finally tossed it in a remote corner of the Disney store. And I definitely, most certainly did NOT tell my child to do the same thing with an unwanted mint later in the day………{I’m probably not as embarrassed about this as I should be, but the point is to be brutally honest here, right?!}

I did NOT allow my 7 yr old to skip school today (and stay home with daddy) because we got in late from Austin last night…and I did NOT email the school saying she was sick…..shhhh……… {I’m working on ‘mother of the year’ here, aren’t I?}

And finally, no matter what anyone tells you, I do NOT want to skip today and go back to bed…….not me!

Enjoy more "Not Me Monday" postings at MckMama's blog!

Saturday, December 6, 2008

What Have You Done?

I got this post idea from the blog, Life In Beverly Hills.

The bolded items are what I have done…..

1.started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band

4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland - WORLD
8. Climbed a mountain…..part of one anyway

9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo (does driving in my car count? I don’t think so)
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping….partially
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language

37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater

55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma

65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Seen the Lincoln Memorial in person
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life…(if this counts)…I’ve gotten lodged food out of both my daughter’s mouths before when they were choking
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92.Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person

96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100.
Totally copied a post from someone else’s blog to your own

What have you done? Post on your blog and link back to the site/blog where you found this list!

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Goal, Shmoal

Okay, I’m going off on a soapbox here………This little rant all started with an innocent comment made by Olivia’s (my 2 yr old) preschool teacher. In a weekly progress note, she made the comment that she is hoping for Olivia to be completely potty trained by December. Well here’s my problem with that: you DON’T set goals for babies and toddlers who are trying to make their way through the developmental milestones…….unless you’re God I guess. Olivia has been peeing in the potty (among other things) since she was a few months shy of her 2 yr birthday in May. We were surprised because we don’t push these kinds of things EVER, but we figured it must have been because she has a big sis who she sees pee in the potty all the time. The thing is, she isn’t potty trained completely because she still wets her pull up at night sometimes and occasionally during the day. She still alternates wearing panties and pull ups at school and at home. So that got me to thinking about the strong opinions I’ve formed over my last 7 years as a parent on reaching milestones.

My stance on babies/tots reaching their milestones is this: leave them alone, it will happen. Every child has their own plan, their own strengths and weaknesses, their own mind! If you’re getting the thumbs up from your pediatrician at the well baby check ups, and you don’t have any instinctual gut feelings that something is off, then RELAX and leave the kid alone! I hate to see moms who will have their baby “practice” walking….it’s ridiculous and it can ruin the muscles in their feet. You dragging them by their arms up and down the hallway isn’t helping…..that’s not walking! And don’t even get me started on walkers. I hate those things. I believe in open, free play space. Quit worrying about what your neighbor’s kid is doing, or what your sister’s kids all did, or what your mother says you did when you were little (believe me, she doesn’t really remember, it’s been 20-30 years ago).

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying to ignore the kid, I do believe in encouraging words and claps and cheers for effort, attempts and milestones completed. I just can’t stand to hear people compare their baby to other babies (or even worse, their siblings) like it’s a big competition about who cuts teeth first, or why their kid isn’t walking, etc. Have you ever seen a healthy 7 yr old who doesn’t pee on the potty, or who still drinks from a bottle? That’s right; it doesn’t happen that way folks. So ultimately it doesn’t really matter what day they chuck the bottle or pacifier, take their first step, or stop using diapers/pull-ups; what matters is that they get the job done and most importantly in their own time.

Rattlesnakes, Deer, and Horses....Oh My!

So if you read my Not Me Monday post, you know that I went camping in Big Bend Ranch state park over the Thanksgiving weekend. I went with my girls, my parents, my brother and his family, and my sister and her boyfriend---my husband {wisely} opted out of the trip. There are a few highlights {or low points, however you choose to look at it} that I want to share with you. For easy reading, I organized them into a timeline, but I warn you—this post is a little long, rambly, and all over the place.

Wednesday: I leave work at noon to pick up my brother so we can drive 692 miles to join the rest of our family who had already left at 3AM that morning. At 11:30pm we arrive in Presidio, which is the town that the park is located; we think we’ve made excellent time. We turn onto FM 170 as we read the map and start looking for signs for the park. Instead we come to a dead end in the road, we choose a direction at random and come to another dead end, we go back, choose the other way and get the same result. We go back, thinking we must have missed a turn…there are several roads to choose from, with no street signs. There is just desert sand, a few shrubs, and random houses. We drive back the way we came into the heart of Presidio, which is basically a ghost town at this hour, and then start over. We finally find the turn we missed that continues FM 170. We are happy now that we are almost there. We so foolishly thought. About 30 minutes after first arriving in Presidio, we finally see signs for the state park. We turn onto a gravel road and after a few minutes we see a map with all the listed campsites. I look for ours and it looks as though it’s another 10 miles or so. HOWEVER, we can only drive about 20 miles an hour on this road. So we continue on down the gravelly, bumpy road. Keep in mind that it is pitch black outside, a little after midnight, and we have already been driving for 11 hours at this point. OH, and I left out the best part. The last phone connection we’d had with my family was several hours before, so we could only assume that wherever our campsite was—there was no cell phone service. So we were left with no directions from Presidio to the park. After about 30 minutes on this gravel road, we start seeing some of the campsite names; we keep driving, and driving, and driving. Mind you, this is the country so there are no lights anywhere except our headlights and the stars above. An hour passed and things were getting pretty twilight zoneish. Then another half hour passed and we are still driving on the same road, occasionally our headlights would hit the side of a hill or mountain and I could tell that we were slowly elevating. After almost two hours we see a building and a small light, I realize it’s the ranch headquarters and I know we are close to our campsite!!! I run into the restroom and quickly get back in the car. My brother rechecks the posted map and says we are not far from our campsite…..and he was right, a few more minutes and we saw the sign, turned, and saw our parents van and tents. It was 2:30AM at this point, we ran up to the tents, and all my parents could do was thank God that we made it. They thought we would never find it, because they hadn’t had phone service for the last hour of the trip and had no way to call and give us specific instructions. Thank goodness they have smart children (haha). I was so happy to be there! I had really started to question my own sanity during the last hour of the drive.

Thursday: As we are talking to one of the park rangers, she happens to mention that rattlesnakes are actually not in hibernation yet (as we thought). The days are still so sunny and warm that they come out to sunbathe and then make their way into hiding when evening falls. So of course I start worrying about stumbling over one as I sleepily climb out of my tent during the night to pee on the ground. Later as I’m driving up to the store at ranch headquarters, what do I see?....a rattlesnake in the road. It was coiled up, so I pull up as close as I can get and take pictures. Then later as I drove back I saw another one (positive it was a different one because it was in a different spot completely). We also spotted several deer on the drive up, while we were hiking, and of course the drive back….oh and there were several wild boars that run loose at the park.

Friday: Since Presidio is right on the border of Mexico, we decided to drive out of the park and cross over for a few hours and check out the shopping. I’ve been to a few border towns, and some touristy spots in Mexico before; I love to practice what little Spanish I do know, but thankfully my brother’s wife is fluent. As soon as we cross over we realize that this one is not so much a touristy town. There weren’t any good shops, or a market square, etc. However, my brother and his fam were hungry so against my better judgment we hunted down a place to eat. We walk in and there are only two chairs, no tables, the man says that he is just getting set up but we can order food and take it out. Oh okay, thanks. So it’s a fried chicken place and the menu looks normal, they have pics of chicken dinners according to how many pieces you want. I get a 2 piece, they get a 3 piece and a 4 piece (I promise there is a point here); when we get the food and walk out, we have to sit on the curb to eat. We all open our containers to realize that no matter what meal we each ordered, we all ended up with the same part of the chicken…..and what part that was…I will never know. They were sort of wingish looking……but who knows. The girls and I opted for nibbling the fries and drinking the pepsi instead. When it was almost time to go, Alexandria insisted that she find a particular necklace, so I hunt down the street vendor who has them and proceed to engage in my very first transaction completely in EspaƱol (woo hoo, yay me!)….I was so proud. I even talked him down from 10.00 to 7 (although I was going for 5). And apparently my accent was pretty convincing because at the end he started telling me something in rapid fire Spanish, in which I had to sheepishly reply “No comprende”. He just laughed.

Saturday: Horseback riding tour. Alexandria and I shared a horse (Livy of course stayed behind with my parents); my brother and his fam also joined us on the tour. So we were supposed to ride for 1 hour, but then they offered to continue for an extra hour for free. So this was fine and everything was going okay, until we got to the mountainous areas. Then I realized that they expected us to ride our horse up and down the side of rocky hills. And let me just say right here—I’ve never ridden a horse before. So as we were making our way down one of the rocky hills, Alexandria starts crying and I start praying. I prayed profusely for us not to fall. Then at some point I had to start mentally reciting the Lord’s prayer; which is something I do when I get into these predicaments because it keeps my mind occupied enough to not go through the list of all the tragic outcomes that could happen in my current situation. Finally we made it to the bottom. We relaxed, thanked God, and then started to really enjoy the scenery. Towards the end, all the horses started running towards the corral……I had to work really hard to keep mine from even trotting because it felt like we would both go flying off the back. Not to mention the trail guides didn’t speak a word of English, so they weren’t a whole lot of help in teaching us how to ride.

So that’s it…….we made it home in about 10 hours (not counting the stops), and I slept wonderfully in my own bed with dreams of mountains and wildlife, and with a whole new understanding of the term saddle sore.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Has It Even Been a Week?




First of all, I have NOT been neglecting my blog so much lately, that I mainly post “Not Me Mondays” now. Nope, not me!

I am NOT drawing a blank as I write this, thinking that I haven’t really done anything that I’m embarrassed or ashamed of this week……. {oh give me a minute, I’ll think of something }….

I did NOT skip the traditional Turkey dinner this year and go camping for 4 days at the Big Bend State park with my family……….which means I did NOT have to get up in the middle of the night each night and pee on the ground…… in the dark…… surrounded by cactus and other various forms of wildlife. Not me!

I did NOT sign myself and my 7 yr old daughter up for a horseback riding tour, and then find myself praying profusely throughout the tour that she did not fall off the back of our horse and hit her head on the very rocks that our horse seemed to be stumbling on as it made it’s way down the side of a mountain. Nope, that wasn’t me!

And the morning after our 10 hr drive home from this trip, I did NOT let the girls have free reign over the entire house while I drifted in and out of sleep on the couch till 11AM. Not me! I know better than that!

Enjoy more "Not Me Monday" postings at MckMama's blog!

Monday, November 24, 2008

Definitely Not!




First of all, I did NOT have such a boring and mundane week that I can’t think of much to say.

But….

I have NOT delayed packing for our 4 day camping trip that we leave for tomorrow night! That would be crazy.

I am NOT hoping this day at work goes by super duper fast because I have so much to do at home. Who would do that? Not me!

I am NOT starting to have major anxiety about taking a 7 yr old and a 2 yr old several hundred miles from home… to camp… in the mountains…. in the winter…. for 4 days.

I am NOT considering buying one of those harness/leash thingy’s for my 2 yr old, even though I have always thought they were a little animalistic. And it’s definitely NOT because I am starting to have so much anxiety about even the smallest of hiking trails in the mountains/desert. Not me!

Enjoy more "Not Me Monday" postings at MckMama's blog!

Thursday, November 20, 2008

A Few Bucks

So on my lunch hour today I’m eating in my car and reading (something I do a lot because I’m an anti social weirdo), and this middle aged couple pull up next to me. The man gets out and comes around to my window which was cracked. He stayed far enough back to not seem threatening and he starts off with “can you do me a favor?”, so of course I know he wants money. Before I could speak, he tells me this long story about why he doesn’t have any money and why he needs it. The first part of the story I really don’t remember because my brain was too busy on alert; thinking the woman may come up to my other window while I’m distracted by him, and bash my head in or something (yes, I watch too much TV). But, as I relaxed and listened, I realized how much his story didn’t add up….and was therefore probably a lie to cover up whatever truth he felt would sound like an unacceptable reason to be panhandling. I finally had to interrupt him and say “I don’t have any money, I’m sorry” (which was actually the truth). He said “okay, thank you” and got back in his car.

This incident got me to thinking about all the times I’ve been approached for money, all the times I felt that the person had hidden reasons for panhandling, and the many times that I would shake my head no and go on my way. Somehow though I always manage to feel guilty later. What really causes people to end up in these situations? Drugs? Alcohol? Lots of poor decisions in life? Does anyone really panhandle because some fluke incident happened, like the one the man was trying to tell me today? It seems like if you are employable, have shelter, and in this man’s case have transportation you would have access to money and resources. Besides that, what would I have given him if I had cash on me, 2 dollars? That wouldn’t get him anything he would need in order to stop panhandling. Then again, should it really be a decision? If I have a few dollars, shouldn’t I just give it to whoever is asking regardless of why I think they need it? As a self-proclaimed Christian, I know that it isn’t okay for me to judge someone else, and I try very hard (most of the time) to fight that natural urge us humans seem to have, and not pass judgment so easily. On one hand I don’t want to enable the crackhead panhandler who wants to use my few bucks to buy a fix, but on the other hand I don’t know for a fact that’s what he’s going to do, and even if he does it might be better then him quitting cold turkey while living on the streets and possibly dying in a ditch. Seriously. I’ve thought about these things.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Lists

So I’ve been struggling to come up with a topic to write on this week. I haven’t posted in two weeks other then the “Not Me Mondays”. It doesn’t mean I haven’t had things going on to write about, I just haven’t felt like composing any of it into a story. So to keep it semi-short and semi-sweet, I’ve composed a few lists.

What’s stressing me out right now:

1)Alexandria is having trouble with classmates at school. To the point that I’m extremely upset and just beside myself over what to do about it.

2)I have been more and more disheartened by my church’s Sunday service. Yet I haven’t had the energy, courage, or gumption to go “church shopping”.

3)I am finding my weekday evenings short, cram packed full, and consistently unsatisfying.

4)I have been in more arguments with my husband these past few weeks then I even care to count.

5)And to top it all off, I have been extremely hormonal.

Fall has been a busy, busy time for us this year. From October till now we’ve managed to survive:

1) Alexandria’s birthday party
2) HOT Fair
3) Axtell’s Homecoming week
4) Halloween
5) Parent turkey dinner at Ally’s school
6) Carnival (where Ally was 2nd grade duchess)
7) Flu shots for the girls
8) A garage sale

Still to come this month:

1) Parent turkey dinner at Olivia’s preschool
2) Alexandria’s 2nd grade class performance at the PTA meeting tonight
3) Thanksgiving family camping trip

Wow. That was actually a little therapeutic to organize it all into lists!

Monday, November 17, 2008

No Yo El Lunes

Or better known as Not Me Monday...




First of all, I have NOT been suffering from writer’s block with my blog this week.

Secondly, I did NOT get super frustrated at work on Friday and then proceed to write a totally passive-aggressive email to my supervisor. Not me!

I did NOT drive to work this morning hoping and praying that my email did not come across in any way that I did not intend.

And……I am NOT wishing I could get out of the Turkey dinner at work today, even though I got up early and made homemade macaroni and cheese.

Because I am NOT feeling anti-social today, not at all! Not me.

Enjoy more "Not Me Monday" postings at MckMama's blog!

Monday, November 10, 2008

Just Another Manic Monday

Remember that song? Anyway....




I did NOT read the last half of the 3rd Twilight book PLUS the entire 4th Twilight book (minus the last two chapters) in three days. No way, I have much cooler things to do on the weekends then have my nose in a book!

I did NOT get into at least 4 arguments in two hours with my mother while planning our family camping trip.

And saving the best for last……

I did NOT get myself into an altercation (at my daughter’s school carnival, no less) with two other parents on Saturday. Not me, I’m way too anti confrontational for that!

Enjoy more "Not Me Monday" postings at MckMama's blog!

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

I Voted

My husband and I dashed into the voting polls (kids in tow) at around 6:30pm last night. Alexandria (my 7 year old) has been pretty interested in the whole process. So on the way home from voting I told her that originally women were not allowed to vote. I explained that back then their opinions were not considered important, furthermore it was considered that they should just adopt whatever opinion their father or husband had. I asked her what she thought about this and without any hesitation (that’s my girl!) she replied “not fair”. Afterwards, I actually began to feel elated by being part of something so historic; something so much bigger then myself. Not just having voted for the first Black president, but for having voted. Yeah, I voted in the last two elections but it wasn’t quite the same. This election was big. Plus after explaining to my daughter how women were not allowed to vote in the past, I realized that even if my single vote would somehow never get counted, even if the person I chose hadn’t won….I still voted. I still practiced a right that many American women fought for; a right that our soldiers still fight to keep today—Freedom. The Freedom of choice, Freedom to walk into the voting booth and give my opinion. I was able to look at two potential candidates and then choose who I wanted as my nation’s leader; and my opinion was not silenced.

Monday, November 3, 2008

Say Cheese.....Please?

The day after Halloween we had a scheduled photo shoot with Sears. In hindsight this wasn’t the best planning on my part; to get two tired, cranky, kids with “Halloween hangovers” up and dressed for a photo shoot. It actually sounds pretty stupid now that I’m writing it. Anyway, the morning started out bad right off the bat. The girls got up fairly early despite having gone to bed on sugar highs at around 11:30 the night before. Alexandria was especially sassy and proceeded to get herself in trouble several times before even leaving the house. Olivia on the other hand was in a decent mood. She even tried to finish dressing herself while I was busy arguing with Alexandria; she came into the room with her long sleeve brown shirt that I put on her, announcing that she now had her pants on-- which were some polka dotted shorts she picked out of the clean laundry pile on the couch….oh and she added socks as a finishing touch. So after I searched for Olivia’s jeans (finally determining that I would have to buy some at Sears before the photo shoot) and got Alexandria ready, I only had time to put my contacts in and throw on some jeans with my t shirt. No makeup, and no teeth brushing (yeah, I’m not afraid to admit it). We raced across town to Sears. On the way, Alexandria dropped her earring down the crack of the seats and then burst into tears (which is what cranky, sleepy, dramatic 7 year olds do). We get to Sears at about 10:25, the appointment is in 5 minutes. I fold the backseat down, find the earring and we rush into the store, quickly find a pair of jeans, try them on Olivia, tear the tag off and take it to the counter to purchase, run up the escalator arriving 10 minutes late for the appointment and then…….we wait.

We wait about 15 minutes for someone to even greet us. When they do, they cannot find my information, so I have to refill out the form. We wait a few more minutes and then they call us into the studio. I won’t say the name of the photographer (and I use that term loosely) but it rhymes with “Shmomique”. She says “what kind of pictures do you want with what backgrounds”, I say “ummm, some of them separate and some together, but I don’t know what backgrounds”. She stares at me to the point that I wonder if I said something weird. Then the shoot begins. First of all, she seemed pretty uncomfortable dealing with kids, secondly she obviously didn’t read the children’s names and ages that Sears made me print on the form. Then Olivia decides to change her cheery disposition of the morning and be totally…..TWO. She says “I don’t want to take my picture”. I explain that everyone wants to see her pretty pictures so could she please do it because it will be so much fun. Then Olivia steps in front of the camera and when asked to smile, she says “no, I don’t want to” and looks away. After a few minutes of this, I finally realize that “Shmomique” is out of her element in dealing with a 2 year old, so I decide if I want to get some smiling pictures of my baby I’ll have to make a fool of myself. To get Olivia to even crack a vague smile I had to wear ridiculous prop hats and make goofy faces behind “Shmomique’s” head. With each new background and pose change, Olivia pressed a little harder to get out of the photo shoot. I shamelessly bribed her with candy, gum, and a toy if she would just “look at the lady and smile”. Every once in a while “Shmomique” would peek her head out from behind the camera and mumble, “smile Livy”. Wow, thanks for your help lady.
So when we were finally done, I was told to wait at the computer table to view my pictures. We waited at least 20 minutes…….by this point all three of us had had enough. I went to the counter to see if someone,
anyone could come and pull my pics up. The woman came over and we went through all the pictures. I was frustrated that the combination of an incompetent photo specialist (as Sears calls them) and a cranky 2 year old made for very few frame worthy pictures; unfortunately that didn’t stop me from spending 140.00. (big sigh)

Halloween

Or Halloweena as Olivia insists that it's called......either way we had a good one.



We started off Trick or Treating at Grandma's house...




Daddy and the girls on the hunt for candy....




Mommy and the girls stop to pose...




And later that night, as we pulled into our driveway....




SEE YOU AT THE POLLS TOMORROW!






Friday, October 31, 2008

Ahhhhh. Friday.

There’s something to be said for Fridays. Personally, it has always been my favorite day of the week. As a child, Fridays meant free day at school, pep rallies in the fall, and sun shiny weekends outside in the spring. Having grown up in a family that didn’t have much money, Fridays were our official once a week day to eat out. We were also allowed to stay up as late as we wanted on Friday nights, and the best part was NO SCHOOL the next day!
Now as an adult, Friday is still by far my favorite day. Things at work seem less urgent, less gloomy. I know I can go home and do whatever I want; I don’t have to prepare for the next day. I can stay up till 2AM reading or watching TV and not have to worry about lack of sleep the next morning. I have my whole weekend ahead of me. Fridays are AWESOME.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN! Pictures to come later and probably a story……

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Thoughts on Christianity and CWO

I was going to add my name to the Christian Women’s Organization blog roll so I decided to read the “rules” first.
1) You have to completely agree with their statement of faith. “Okay. Check.”
2) Your blog site may be monitored and has to be approved in order to officially join. “Um, okay? Check.”
3) Any blog containing foul language or questionable material will be removed from the list. “Whoa, wait a minute.”
Who determines if what I say is questionable material for a Christian woman? God? Is He reading my blog? Because the last time I checked, He was the only One I truly answer to. And as far as I know, He and I are cool. Do I occasionally use foul language? You bet. Am I proud of myself for this? No, but only because I have children, and I wouldn’t want them to grow up hearing loads of profanity. Do I sometimes post material that someone else might deem inappropriate, questionable, or offensive? Probably. But, isn’t that the point of having your own space to write; so that you can express your own thoughts, ideas, and opinions? So the CWO blog roll rules prompted me to think, what is the ideal blog of a Christian woman? Do I have one? I like to write complainy, whiney posts just as much as I like writing the other stuff. I use bad language, I laugh at raunchy movies, I have tattoos, I am judgmental, and the list goes on and on. Unfortunately no one can read one or two of my posts and get the full picture of who I am; who I am as a mother, a wife, a sister, a daughter, a friend, or a Christian. No one can look at me or read what I write and see into my past; or see that I was raised in a home of faith, God, and church, or that when I was 14 I really and truly began my own private journey as a Christian. So I think I’ll pass on joining the blog roll and putting their cute little button on my site. I don’t need an official CWO person to determine if I or my site fit all their Christianity “guidelines”.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Monday, Monday


I definitely did not just realize that this list could include things from all week instead of just Monday. Not me, I’m smarter than that!

I did not leave dishes in my sink two evenings in a row this week because I was too tired to do them.

I did not send out a couple of text messages during church on Sunday. That would be rude.

I was not late to work this morning, and I definitely have not been surfing the internet instead of working. Not me!

Oh, and I did not start reading the first Twilight book because people wouldn’t stop talking about how good they were. And don’t worry that I’m enjoying it, because I’m not!

Enjoy more "Not Me Monday" postings at MckMama's blog!

Monday, October 13, 2008

Politics and Other Things I don't Understand

Disclaimer: This is a pretty opinionated post (although I did hold back quite a bit). If you are easily offended by the “pro life, pro choice debate” or outraged by political ignorance (such as mine) then you shouldn’t read. And as always, my intent is not to offend anyone just simply share the thoughts that roll around in my head.

Why are people complaining that Obama doesn't have enough experience? What political experience does McCain have that Obama doesn't? Seriously…tell me because I don’t know. I mean, aside from the fact that McCain is white haired what about him says "ah yes, he is so wise and will lead our country to a better place". George W. has a lot of gray hair and we all know how that story ended. What's wrong with a young president? What's wrong with a black president? Shouldn't our country be to the point that we can choose a leader that didn’t come from the same "old white man" cookie cutter? McCain was clearly carved out of the same cheese as Bush.
For those of you who are afraid to have a non-white president (and oh yes, I’ve heard it), I'm not even gonna address that here because you're stupid. Sorry, but you are. For those of you who are worried about his tax increase proposal, you must make at least a quarter of a million dollars a year...so what the hell are you doing reading blogs? Go out and live your posh life! Now I admit, and it's probably obvious anyway, that I'm not too knowledgeable about politics. There is a lot I don't understand. But, I know this:
I know when someone looks and sounds like an idiot (Bush), and does it repeatedly on national television (Bush). That's just not a person I want making critical decisions that effect my taxes, my economy, my safety, my choices, my country, essentially my freedoms. I understand enough to realize (along with most of America) that McCain chose Palin in hopes of gaining some democratic voters. Duh. You know how us liberated women love “girl power”. Guess he figured that would be his strongest asset. And, while Palin is appealing to me in some respects, the VP does not run our country.
And as far as both of the presidential candidates’ stance on abortion…this is the only part of my opinion I’m going to share, and then you’ll interpret it how you will.
I once saw a sticker from Planned Parenthood that read, “Behind every choice, is a story”. I realize there are many, many mothers out there who raises her children lovingly in a clean, caring environment, reads her parenting magazines to be up to date on vaccinations & educational toys, breastfeeds, home schools, makes homemade organic baby food, and truly unconditionally loves her child, and understands that at any moment she would sacrifice anything, including her life, for the sake of her child. However, while it may be hard to fathom, I believe that for every 1 mother out there like that there are 3 mothers who use drugs while pregnant and/or openly in front of her child, party all night while her child is in the other room with no dinner, no bath, maybe scared, maybe lonely, maybe just used to this way of life; is verbally, physically or sexually abusive on any given day, or lives with a man who does the same, has multiple children with different fathers—none of which are involved in their child’s life, does not ever show love, compassion or kindness to her children, does not know how to give healthy love because it was never given to her. If you don’t believe this exists or that this is a rarity---you’re fooling yourself. If you think CPS “handles” all of these cases and puts the child in a better place—again, you’re fooling yourself. Our system is way too overcrowded to take care of all these children, and there is not enough manpower or money to properly screen all of the foster homes—therefore some of these kids get placed in a home similar to what they came from. So yes, I will say it…. I think it’s nice and easy to be appalled at people who would not go through with a pregnancy, when you’re sitting in a middle to upper class home, with a substantial income, well educated, mentally stable, and not suffering from any addictions.
THAT being said, I think for this particular election there are far bigger issues at hand then where someone stands on abortion. I think that we need a leader who can relate to the majority of the people he/she is leading. The majority. Not the elite few.

Another Monday....blah

I was not up half the night with a stomach virus. Nope. Not me.

I did not come into work today only because I don’t have any paid time off yet. I want to be here feeling like ****!

I did not sleep in an extra 15 minutes this morning and then rush around like a mad woman to get to work on time. Not me! I don’t do stuff like that.

I did not drive to work this morning secretly hoping I would have nothing to do today.

And as usual, I did not type this blog while at work on agency time. So don’t even think I did!

Friday, October 10, 2008

PTA. Yay or Nay?

I just want to share my thoughts on the PTA (Parent Teacher Association). I signed up for this association last year and paid our fees, thinking I was doing my parental duty by putting myself in the association that I thought was to bring teachers and parents together for the good of our children.

Turns out… I was wrong.

Apparently, the PTA officers (aka, moms) use the address and phone numbers that you submit upon joining, against you. They harass you to participate in fund raisers, call you during the workday to see if you can send 2 pounds of candy to school on Monday for some made up celebration, or meet them at so-and-so’s house to bake potatoes for teacher appreciation week. “Um, I’m sorry. I work. I have to pay bills right along with my husband.” Don’t misunderstand, I’m all for teacher appreciation…but let’s make it equal…how bout some parent appreciation? Teachers do get paid to do what they do, parents do not (at least not in the monetary form). But that’s beside the point. If PTA is supposed to be an organization that promotes a team effort of teachers and parents to provide an education for our children, then let’s appreciate everyone involved. Please don’t send me a bazillion brochures for pointless fundraisers in which I never get to see how the money is spent; please don’t call me at work and ask me to buy things, send things, bake things and then sound disappointed when I explain my week is full already. I can’t speak for other mothers, but some mornings just getting my child to school on time, neatly dressed, hair combed, teeth brushed, well rested, and breakfast in her tummy is a small miracle. So maybe someone should be baking me a potato!

Monday, October 6, 2008

"Not Me" Monday

I absolutely did not lay in bed an extra 20 minutes because I was sleepy and enjoyed listening to the rain.

And of course I did not come into work 35 minutes late because I knew no one would be looking for me. I would never do that!

I did not stop at Whataburger and get a breakfast biscuit even though I was already late! That would be irresponsible!

And don't even think that I'm typing this blog at work because I wouldn't think of doing stuff like that while at work. Not me.

Don't worry that I was looking up camping gear online at work, cause I wasn't!

And last night, I did not let Alexandria and Olivia have candy before they ate their dinner. Not me!

My First Born

In light of my older daughter’s 7th birthday this past Wednesday, I decided to write a post about my pregnancy with her and the day she was born. More like reminiscing for me…probably totally boring for you. But, it’s my blog so I can write what I want.

My pregnancy with her came as a surprise, but I like to say that it’s the best surprise I’ve ever, ever had. However, I quickly discovered that I’m not a pleasant pregnant woman. Other then the excitement of a new baby coming, I was eternally miserable. I greeted each day by puking and continued to puke all day for the first 4 ½ months. (Did you know you can throw up a jolly rancher sucker? You can.) Instead of gaining pregnancy weight, I lost 10 pounds from vomiting. I was exhausted; I literally had dark circles under my eyes all the time. I withdrew that semester from Angelo State University. I eventually quit my job for AAFES at the Base Exchange. I couldn’t leave the couch most days in the beginning.
Then FINALLY like an overnight miracle I was cured from morning sickness! I was approx 5 months into the pregnancy now, was barely showing (an advantage of being 5’10) but had gained my 10 pounds back and probably 25 more at this point. I started a licensed daycare in my home to maintain two incomes (I must have been a glutton for punishment in those days).
Around 7 months into the pregnancy, my active little baby kicked a disc loose in my lower back. I limped around for a about a week and sat with a heating pad on my back until it was healed. My upper back pain was horrendous. My back couldn’t believe that my boobs were so huge…. as this had never been an issue before.
My due date was September 24th and it couldn’t come fast enough. I was at my biggest during the hottest time of the year! We slept with the air around 58 degrees, my husband slept in shirt, shorts, sweat pants and sometimes a sweatshirt. I slept in underwear and a tank top. Granted, I did have to sleep in that ever so comfy “pregnancy position”…on my side with a heating pad on my back, two pillows under my head, a pillow folded between my legs, and another pillow propped up behind me.
So 50 lbs later, my due date came and went and my body had not shown any signs of wanting to go into labor. My doctor said I would be induced the following Monday…. October 1st, 2001. I was to be at the hospital on that Sunday night at 9pm for the torture to begin. For those of you who know what I’m talking about, you’ll understand this brief explanation….I didn’t just have to start on Pitocin, I had to start with Cervidil. That’s all I’m gonna’ say. Oh, but let me add that when you’ve been given several “doses” of Cervidil, eventually when being checked for dilation, it feels like they’re using a knife.
The true pain started somewhere on Monday afternoon. My plan was to see how bad the pain was before deciding on an epidural, but I knew that I did not want the pain medicine that they put in your IV (can’t remember the name).
After the contractions were coming every minute and were pretty damn strong, I asked for medicine. My mistake was calling it “medicine” and not an epidural. So after my husband griped at the nurse for not coming fast enough with it, she quickly came in and injected my IV without consulting with me first. I immediately felt sleepy…. the problem was I would doze off only to be jerked awake by horrible pain every minute or two. I couldn’t talk to people without my eyes closing. I started explaining that I wanted an epidural. My mom thought I was too looped to know what I was saying. My mind was very clear, but the meds made my movements slow…which is extremely frustrating, especially for a control freak like me. I looked at my husband and said, “tell them to get me an epidural”. He did what he was told, like the good little birthing partner he is. NOW. Sitting up on the table to get an epidural, while you’re having contractions is a very uncomfortable situation to say the least. Oh yeah, and being told not to move a muscle while they insert a needle into your spine…just icing on the cake. But once I got through it, laid back down, and it kicked in…awesome. I could finally think straight and be excited that my daughter was coming into the world!
I fell asleep and slept for two hours, when I woke up I was dilated to a 9. As soon as I felt like pushing we began. After an hour and a half of pushing, and 22 hours and 40 minutes from when I checked into the hospital, my daughter was born... and pain free for both of us! She weighed 7 lbs, 9 oz and had curly blonde hair matted to the top of her head. And now, because this post is long enough already, I end the story with the fact that she has had a very healthy, happy childhood for 7 years, and is one of the biggest blessings in my life.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

10 Years In and It's Still a Mystery

What could I possibly be talking about? Marriage. One of life’s mysteries. Sometimes I think Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell had the right idea……just act married, don’t actually make it legal. I’m not sure if that would make it easier to bail but it seems like it would be. Something about that little piece of paper making it legal…..you feel more compelled to stay even when it gets hard.

Men and women could not be more different. Yet we come together in a union, make a home, maybe raise a family, maybe make some money, and not only are we somehow supposed to survive it without killing each other….. but we’re actually supposed to still like, respect, and love each other! There once was a time where this didn’t seem crazy to me……fast forward to almost 10 years of marriage, two children, a mortgage, careers ending and starting, and all the cynicism makes sense to me now!!

Why do any of us get married anyway? Companionship? True love? Oops, the test is showing two pink lines? I don’t know, I have no answers. I got hitched 9 years and 7 months ago and there are still days when I wake up and wonder why I did it. Don’t get me wrong, I still love my husband…..very much. I just thought that by now we’d have this marriage thing all figured out; that our relationship would flow like water in a creek making all the stones smooth with time. But nah…..we still have the same stupid arguments, and every now and then we throw something new in there to fuss about. Why is that? Does anyone else walk away from a one hour discussion thinking you’re finally resolving issues, and then a month later there you are fighting about the same damn thing again?! Every time I think I am so running out of energy for this marriage business…..I find myself thinking of all the reasons I loved Abel in the first place. And all the reasons I have found to love him this many years later.

All I really have figured out at this point is this: 1) we still wake up in the mornings and want to be together, though I can’t say that happens every day….just most. 2) We’re better together then we would be apart…I think. 3) We obviously make “super DNA” together because our children are two of the most beautiful, intelligent creatures that ever lived.

So I guess we’ll keep trudging forward and see where it all goes….

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Okay, But Let's Talk About Me Instead.

I’m not sure what inspired this moment of narcissism, but it sounded like fun to write totally random but totally true statements about myself!

I eat a cheeseburger and fries at least once a week.

I fit the Cancerian Crab descriptions to a T.

I get bored with routines.

I love to watch reruns of Golden Girls, Designing Women, and Mama’s Family.

I will laugh at inappropriate times and at inappropriate things.

I am a woman of strong faith, and I come from a long line of strong women with faith.

I have written many blogs in bed at 3AM because I can’t sleep, but forget them by the next morning.

I have self confidence issues.

I believe everyone has more then one soul mate.

I spent all my teenage years and most of my early adulthood hating my curly hair and my height, but am finally learning to like it.

Music cures everything for me.

There once was a time when Tequila was my drink of choice.

I have never thrown up when drunk. Ever.

Motherhood is the one and only thing I have ever felt completely confidant about. Not work, not marriage, not friendships, not family, not school. Just motherhood.

I spent all of junior high and high school with a learning disability that went unnoticed….unfortunately for me.

I have a soft spot for animals.

I do not have a green thumb. In fact, I have the opposite. I have a curse that causes seeds not to grow and plants to die around me, especially when left in my care.

I only drink out of disposable cups or cans because I hate the cabinet smell in glasses…even at my own house.

I’ve been known to be way too judgmental, way too sensitive, and way too analytical (or obsessive as some people like to call it).

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Out of The Mouths of Babes....

Just wanted to share a little bit of the daily comments our two yr old so wonderfully entertains us with!

Quotes directly from Olivia:

The Britney song “Piece of Me” playing loudly and Olivia singing at the top of her lungs……..“you want a piece a meat”. [wrong word, yet somehow still fitting…]

Having been asked to get under the covers while I read to her………“give me a break”.

On the way to my parent’s house…….”I’m gonna tell Paw paw I’m a dude”

Having spotted a deer head mounted on the wall at Cracker Barrel…….. “eewwww! a puppy!”

Thursday, September 11, 2008

September 11th

Seven years ago today I was awoken by a phone call at about 8:00 in the morning. It was my husband calling from his office to let me know that an airplane had crashed through one of the twin towers in NYC. He said something about it being terrorists and my first words were, “well Bush got his way…we’re going to war”. As we hung up, my alarm radio went off and they were talking about the plane crash. In my sleepy haze, I thought, “this must be really big”. I went into the living room and turned on the television. Between the time my husband hung up with me and I got into the living room, the second plane had hit (if my memory serves me correctly). Every channel was airing it. I couldn’t get away from it. Did I mention my husband was in the Air Force, and that we lived on a military base in west Texas? Or that I was 11 days away from my due date with my first child? DEPRESSING!

The base went into the highest threat-con status, meaning we couldn’t come or go without our car being searched, without routine checks. I had a prenatal visit the next day and for the first time in my pregnancy my husband wasn’t able to accompany me because all personnel were advised not to leave base during the day and in their BDU’s. And I couldn’t get away from it! Every channel was broadcasting up to the minute reports. Not that I don’t think that kind of event deserved that type of media coverage-- it was just soooo hard to watch. I was scared but I was mainly depressed. Who wants to bring a small, innocent, defenseless baby into this world knowing that we are at war? Knowing that although we think our country is safe against terrorists, and that our military is the strongest in the world…someone got through. Someone got through and killed thousands of innocent people with no warning.

At least that’s what we were told……..that we had no warning. WE, as the public, may have not had any warning but I strongly feel that the Bush administration had some knowledge. But, I guess when you’re a….let’s see what did I hear him called recently? Oh yeah….”retarded cowboy”….I guess you wouldn’t understand that as President of the United States maybe you should take heed to such a threat. Anyway, sorry my 9/11 memorial turned into a Bush bashing. But, here we are 7 years later…… I have two children now and for their whole lives our country has been at war. But of course when your billions are invested in oil from the Middle East, then why on earth would you stop the war? But that’s a whole different blog……..

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Church Shopping

I’ve been a member at the same church my whole life…..literally; my mother took me for the first time as a newborn. When I was a child our congregation was about 30-40 people, nowadays on a good Sunday there are 10-15 of us. Some families have moved away but mainly the elders just keeping dying off. I know that’s morbid but it’s true! We have no Sunday school, no youth groups, no involvement in the community, etc. Week after week I take the girls [my hubby is Catholic and attends his own church] and ride with my mom and grandma to church……..BLAH. I’m getting nothing out of it, except communion and……..that’s about it, well and I guess the girls are learning how to whisper???? To me church should be a place where your soul and inner peace are replenished for the week. A place where when you leave you feel cleansed or refreshed from the inside out. A place where you grow spiritually each week. I am not getting this. I guess you could say I’ve been continuing there out of loyalty? Out of not wanting to make changes? But, I’ve decided it’s time I go church shopping. I want to stay with Church of Christ, I just hate the idea of going to a new place. Call me strange but there are two main reasons why I do not like visiting new churches….

1) No anonymity. At least not in a Church of Christ. You are pounced on like the fresh meat that you are as soon as the service is over. You are greeted by at least a dozen new people all wanting to know if you’re new to the area, etc. You are sometimes even invited to Sunday dinner. Now I’m sure you’re thinking, “What’s wrong with that”? I’ll tell you. I LIKE being anonymous sometimes. I LIKE not being hounded with a thousand introductions. I don’t like when they assume this was my first time in a church, and they better grab onto me before I fall into the clutches of Satan.

2) Learning the routine; each church has their own routine. Granted, most Church of Christ congregations probably have the same rituals but not necessarily in the same order, and I’ve seen the communion done a few different ways. Again, you might ask, “What’s the big deal”? I’ll tell you. I don’t like feeling lost and looking foolish; especially with two noisy kids by my side to bring all the attention on us. First, you have to find a place to sit and hope that you’re not taking the seat of a regular. Then, you have to figure out what everyone is doing and what’s going to happen next. Then there’s the DREADED “meet and greet”, which some churches do as a regular part of the morning service. Where people actually get up and go around greeting one another, and then if you’re new ……well…you’re shark bait.

So we’ll see how it goes! I’ll be sure and keep you all [well, all 2 of you] posted!

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Don't Forget the Popcorn!

I’ve been too busy to come up with a serious blog subject, much less write one. So as I sit here and watch The Color Purple, I’m inspired to write about some of my favorite movies….

My husband and I are both movie buffs. In fact we actually go around integrating random quotes from movies into our daily lives. Like, “your head has the shell on it” or “real tomato ketchup, Eddie?”. Recognize those? Yeah, you wouldn’t unless you’re a big ‘Tommy Boy’ or ‘National Lampoon’s Vacation’ fan. I love watching movies at the theater, I love watching them at home, I love movies. I’ve even contemplated starting another blog all about movies. Here are some of my all time favorites ….at least the ones that come to mind right now.

The Color Purple—there’s so much to love about this movie I can’t even put it all into words. Empowerment of women is a good way to summarize it in a few words. The top 3 scenes: 1) Sophia (played by Oprah Winfrey) telling Celey (played by Whoopi Goldberg) how she’d been abused her whole childhood but she won’t take it now that she’s a grown woman, 2) When Shug (played by Margaret Avery) is singing to herself outside and then hears the choir from her father’s church singing and she starts running towards the church, and then bursts in singing along with the choir and reunites with her father, 3) At the end when Celey curses “Mister” (played by Danny Glover) for abusing her for so many years.

Steel Magnolias-okay so it’s sort of the typical sappy chick flick but it’s so warm-hearted that you find yourself loving the characters…..and the beauty shop scenes!

Going in a completely different direction…..Knocked Up is a fabulously funny movie and it has an actual storyline. If you can tolerate crude humor then you have to watch! There isn’t anything in this movie that’s not funny. From the sex jokes, bearded roommate, and pink eye breakout to the gyno who misplaced her fingers during the exam. Hilarious.

Superbad—by the same producers as Knocked Up and with some of the same actors. Hilarious movie! Lots of teenage awkwardness, sex jokes and off the wall humor, which I love.

Back to the Future and Adventures in Babysitting—Still watch them to this day every time they come on, and I own the DVD copy of Adventures in Babysitting. Love them. What is there not to like? Who doesn’t wish they could go back in time? And wouldn’t want a cool babysitter like “Kris”?

National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation-I love all of the vacation movies but this one is my all time fave out of the set. We watch it every Christmas without fail and sometimes even in the summer. Top scene: When Clark has his usual breakdown…this time about the Christmas “bonus” he received. And of course who doesn’t love cousin Eddie?

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

90210 flashback

Did anyone get to watch the new 90210? Not me! For some reason Dish Network doesn’t provide me with that channel. I don’t know why else I’m paying 130.00 a month for the “everything” package, except to get everything. But, NO I can’t get the one channel that airs the remake of my most beloved show of all time. Did I mention I HEART Dylan? Or how I always wished I was friends with Brenda, Kelly, and Donna? Yes, I was a dork. But I watched the show religiously every single season. Wednesday nights were MY night. I saw Kelly through an eating disorder, a neglectful mother, her slutty image, almost burning up in a bathroom with a lesbian who was in love with her, her occult phase, and her gun shot induced amnesia. But, I totally rooted for Brenda during the Kelly, Dylan, Brenda love triangle.

So even though I realize I’m 29, a wife, and mother of two…..I still can’t get enough of the teenage predicaments, romances, flings, and just overall drama. So I still occasionally watch 90210 reruns on SOAP network and I totally wanted to see the new 90210!!! If nothing else just to see Jennie Garth and Shannon Doherty reprise their roles. I did buy this weeks copy of US weekly because Shannon was on the front dishing about her time on the show, and on the way home today I did hear “How Do You Talk to an Angel” on the radio. Which any die hard fan will remember was the song of Jamie Walter’s character on the spinoff show “The Heights”, who then later joined the 90210 gang as Donna’s [abusive] love interest. ANYWAY, I’m completely bummed that I can’t watch the new one. I’m actually considering calling the satellite company to see what it would cost to add the channel…….now that’s loyalty. Or maybe it's just weird.

Friday, August 29, 2008

Being At Home

The past few weeks I’ve been at home with no job and no schoolwork to do. This is the first time this has EVER happened in my life, unless you count maternity leave in which I took six weeks each time (but who would count THAT as time off?!). Now that I’ve been hired (yay!) I start work on Tuesday. That gives me 5 more days to experience this amazing “not having to be anywhere at any specific time” feeling. Granted, I still have a two year old to care for during the day and another child to get ready for school each morning-- but that’s a piece of cake compared to some of the schedules and demands I’ve had over the past few years. Here are some things I’ve realized during this time off:

1) I’m not cut out to be a stay at home mom. I’ve kind of known this for a while, but these past few weeks just confirmed it. I hate to clean, I get bored with routines, I don’t have a structured day for my children, and I don’t do anything fun and stay- at- home- momish like arts and crafts. And, just to clarify—I’m not knocking the job at all. Because (not to quote Oprah) but being a mother is the hardest job in the world. I happen to know a few stay at home moms, they chose that path for different reasons and they are great at it! It’s just not for me.

2) My favorite part of the day is about 8-8:30 in the morning. I watch Golden Girls reruns on Lifetime and I think about what’s to be done that day (cleaning, errands). It feels really good to know that the day can be whatever I make it. I don’t have any appointments, I don’t have to answer to anyone (except my two year old), the day holds promise and it feels great!

3) It’s REALLY hard to keep a 2 year old entertained…..safely. Why do they like to climb onto furniture and then jump off?! Why do they eat random things? Why do they love to go into their big sister’s bedroom while she’s at school? Why do they write on furniture and walls? Why do they dip things in the toilet? I don’t know! Okay, really I get that they’re exploring and learning. I’m just glad that I don’t work at a preschool.

So back to the grind on Tuesday, but hopefully it will be more exciting earning a paycheck this time around. Because I’ll be doing what I’m passionate about! So when I find myself missing these relaxed days, and I’m sure I will every now and then, I’ll have to remind myself of what I learned.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Is There Anything She Won’t Eat?

Olivia started off in this world by eating colostrum (the stuff that comes before breast milk) and then at some point my milk came in and she ate that. But by day two of her life whatever was coming out of my breasts at that point proved to not be enough for her appetite. So we were supplementing with formula from the start. Breast milk ended at 6 weeks, baby cereal began at 4 months, followed by baby food at 6 months. All table foods were eaten by 10-11 months minus strawberries, nuts, eggs and seafood (just to be safe). Some of her fave table foods are broccoli, carrots, spaghetti, cheese, turkey, and bacon. She has always been a good little eater. Meaning that she eats pretty much everything she’s given. That being said…..

…starting at the age of around 1 year old…….she has eaten cat food, dirt, actual pieces of grass, other family member’s chewed up gum from the trashcan, food that has fallen on the floor in various parts of the house, Rolaids (about 4 of them), and literally drank toilet water that she dipped out with her potty chair bowl. NOW. I have to say, I PROMISE we do watch our children. She is supervised! But, as you may well know some toddlers just love to put things in their mouths and can do it in a millisecond. The grosser you think it is, the funnier she thinks it is. I have seen her bend over and touch a mud puddle outside and then lick her hand. She has put filthy disgusting shoes in her mouth, tasted rocks and sticks, eaten candy with the wrapper still on it, eaten crayons, and once (that we know of anyway) she ate a coin. All I can do at this point is to NEVER buy any type of poison, keep all cleaners out of sight and up high, and hope she grows out of it soon. Maybe I’ll go with my mother’s reasoning, “she’s a tactile learner”.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

The Mother of a Second Grader!


I’m not sure yet what this year will look like or how it will go, but no matter what I am officially the mother of a second grader! And I feel old. But I’m not! I gave birth to Alexandria at the ripe old age of 22 making me one of the younger moms. But, I’m used to that by now. It’s hard to believe my first born is almost halfway through elementary school! It really does seem like not that long ago that I was dropping her off at daycare for the first time at 2 yrs old. I remember so vividly hearing her scream “mama” as I made my way down the hallway and out of the building. Then a year later when I started her at a new preschool here in Waco… her little three year old legs were shaking because she was nervous and I held her hand until the very last minute. I drove out of the parking lot with tears in my eyes. It’s the huge paradox of parenting. We hold on so tightly to protect, love, and teach only in the end to be able to let go.

So Kindergarten started much the same, she was nervous and I held her hand until the last minute. Then when she started first grade, she was also starting at Axtell (where she’ll be the rest of her school years). Abel and I were both able to take her that first day. She went in, we spoke to the teacher, she found her seat and smiled at us. We hugged her and told her to have a good day and left. I saw a few moms lingering and taking pictures and a stab of guilt hit me. Then I thought, “well, we’ve been through this a few times already”, “she knows she goes to school and we’ll be here to get her at the end of the day”. She’s okay.

I’m expecting the first day of second grade to go the same way. And, this time she’ll see old friends when she enters the classroom. I’m not sure what this year will be like for us. I know first grade was filled with an hour of assigned homework every evening, PTA performances, field trips, and disputes with friends on the playground. I’m thinking second grade will be much the same…. but with harder math.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Near Death Experience? Or Just a Moment of Reflection?

So you know how people say that when they've had a near death experience, their life flashes before their eyes? Well here’s the experience I had on Tuesday evening.

We had decided to go to the movies and leave Olivia with my mother in law this time (see previous blog). There were storm clouds here but nothing menacing or seemingly dangerous. As we drove into Bellmead there were black clouds and lightening but it looked as though it would clear up the further we drove into Waco. Just as we passed the turkey plant on Lakeshore the rain started pouring down so fast and so hard we couldn’t see the road and we could barely see the car ahead of us. Abel slowed down to 30 and then the rain got even harder. We literally couldn’t see anything; it was as though someone was pouring buckets of water on our windshield. The car did a slight fishtail and all I could think was we were going to plunge over the side of the road. He couldn’t pull over because you couldn’t see the lines on the road to even know where the shoulder was. All he could do was steer blindly and hope that no one else crashed into us or that we didn’t drive off the road.

What made the experience worse was that my children were in the backseat. Although thankfully they were somehow oblivious to the danger and I could hear Olivia giggling. I felt helpless and not in control…which I hate. I started panicking which turned into an actual panic attack, making it the second one I’ve ever had in my life. My hands were shaking, my lips were quivering, and I couldn’t even look up. I covered my face and prayed. Tears dripped down my face in silent prayer. We went on for what seemed like forever but probably just 5 minutes of blind driving. I prayed over and over again for my children to come out of it safely. And then here’s the part where I guess some people would think about their life. What I thought about was the things I’d done that I was sorry for. I didn’t go through all of them mind you (there wouldn’t have been time haha); just the most recent things that I wasn’t too proud of or felt bad about. I thought it was interesting that of all the things that could have flashed before me---family, wedding day, births, happy times---I thought about what I was sorry for. Wonder what that says about me? Do I somehow think that if something bad happens to me it’s punishment for the wrong things I’ve done? Or maybe I watch too much TV and I just assume that people really flash through those events when they think they might die. Or maybe I’m just over analyzing (I have been known to do that).

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