Rednecks, Chihuahuas, and Other Highlights of My Week

So my house has been crazy with illness all week; from stomach viruses to asthma/allergy issues. And, let me just say that I hate vomiting….not that anyone likes it…but I really, really hate it. Here are some other highlights of my week:

While sitting at a red-light, I noticed a bumper sticker some redneck had on his truck {and I say redneck because he had a sticker of a deer head on his truck, next to one that said ‘Ted Nugent for president’…so case closed.}, it read “Europeans call it socialization, Americans call it welfare, Obama calls it change”. Now maybe I’m reading this wrong (and if I am, just tell me) but it sounded like an insult to Obama and welfare. If so, let me just get on my soapbox here and start by saying that Obama did not create welfare, or the U.S. welfare system. He was just put into leadership of a country that already has this system in place, albeit a screwed up system, but a system already in place. Secondly, I don’t get the big complaint with welfare, helping each other out, or liberalism. Especially from people who claim to be Christians. I’m sorry, unless I learned from a different Bible, Jesus was a poor carpenter who sought out the sick and the poor to HELP them. But, sometimes I have to wonder if Republicans are somehow picturing Jesus as a stuffy old white man in an expensive suit that brings in a 6 figure income, who looked down his nose at others and talked out of his ass. I admit that our welfare system is badly in need of better management, especially since there are so many people who abuse it. But, in the meantime how can we punish those who are using the system like the stepping stone it was designed to be, just because there are some who truly are lazy? Bottom line: don’t complain about something you know nothing about, don’t put ridiculous Obama-hating stickers on your vehicles blaming him for everything wrong with this country, and if you’re going to have all these conservative ideas about welfare, fine--just please don’t play the Christianity card along with it.

We have a new Chihuahua puppy……that I hate. She was a Christmas gift for our 7 yr old, but also meant to be a family dog. I’m not sure what kind of crack we were smoking to 1) buy a dog for a 7 yr old, and 2) not consider that we’d be house training this dog in the WINTER. We take her outside, she sniffs around, sometimes pees, sometimes doesn’t. As soon as we go back in she pees (or worse) right on the floor. Only when it’s sunny, does she decide that she can pee outside. Little bitch. I hate her. She is stupid and untrainable. Last night, I reached my breaking point…… I found myself in my t-shirt, flip flops and coat (thankfully a long coat), with no contacts in (having been just about to get into bed), standing on our back patio, with freezing rain misting down on me, begging this dog to please do her business so we could go back inside. She on the other hand, thought this was some kind of really fun game where she just tries to sneak around me and get back on the patio to go stand by the door. When I finally give up and go in, she craps on the living room floor!!!!!!! For the 50 billionth fu**ing time!!!! I wanted to hurl her through a window. I have no patience to train a dog, I never have. I like the big goofy furry ones who just live outside. Or better yet, cats, who actually enjoy being clean. They don’t eat their own shit, vomit it up, and then eat their vomit. Cats are NORMAL!!! Lap dogs are too needy, they have long nails that scratch you, and they take more patience then Mother Teresa or Jesus ever had in order to house train! And I’m sharing this with you dear friends (or my 3 faithful readers) because I cannot say this to my 7 yr old, who seems to really like the stupid dog.

Last but not least, I have had an ongoing battle with a collection agency who claims I owe a 900.00 phone bill from 2000. I have disputed this with the credit bureaus as well as the collection agency. They are now asking me to fill out a fraud affidavit, have it notarized, as well as file a police report. Are you kidding me? File a freakin’ police report over a phone bill from 9 years ago??!! Wonderful.

Not Me Monday! Er, Tuesday.

I did NOT come to work this morning having spent 6 hours in the ER last night with my asthmatic child…..I did NOT only get approx 4 hours of sleep last night and around 5 the night before, and definitely DON’T have the bloodshot eyes to prove it.

I did NOT watch Clint Eastwood’s Gran Torino on a bootleg DVD that a relative gave us…… and I did NOT love every minute of Eastwood’s performance in that movie! Not me! I would never enjoy something illegal……

I did NOT call Merry Maids for price quotes because I am sick of cleaning..….no way, I love to clean!

And, last but not least…..I definitely did NOT just finish writing this post to then realize that today is Tuesday…..Monday has passed. I am NOT still posting this, because that would make it a “Not Me Tuesday” post. ???!!

Enjoy more "Not Me Monday" postings at MckMama's blog!

Now I'm Getting Pissed....

This week Olivia was moved to the younger 3 yr old classroom at her preschool, although she will not be 3 yrs old for another 4 1/2 months they felt this was a good move for her. Her teacher works 8-5 and so do I, this means I never see her teacher. However, I do still see her previous teacher with whom she is dropped off to every morning, and the “afternoon teacher” who is there when I pick her up. Here was the convo with the previous teacher this morning:

Teacher: Can you bring about 5 pairs of panties and an extra pair of pants up here for her?

Me: Okay, doesn’t she still have some panties here that I brought before?

Teacher: Well just a few, but if we had more we could work on getting her out of those pull ups. And maybe y’all could work with her at home too.

Me: {dumbfounded look} Um, Okay. {thinking how I need to speak with her regular teacher}

Teacher: Is she doing okay in her new classroom?

Me: She seems to be. But, I haven’t been able to talk to her new teacher, apparently she works the same hours I do.

Teacher: {disappointed look} Oh, well maybe I can tell her to write you a note or something.

So after reading what I just wrote, I’m thinking I guess you had to be there to understand the real frustration in it. This teacher (the one from the 2 yr old classroom) is in her 50’s and I’m sure she thinks I’m like 15 (because no one ever believes I’m 29 anyway) and stupid. I can’t believe she would have the nerve to tell me to practice potty training with my child at home!! No shit lady. Oh, we just thought we’d let you guys handle that, in fact why don’t you just take her home with you and raise her since you seem to know what’s best.

I’ve already expressed my views on pushing milestones in a previous blog and I’m not budging. Her pediatrician said around age 3 to be potty trained complete was perfectly fine and normal. Besides that, the child has very few accidents and has woken up dry just about every night in the past few weeks. The thing is this: they want to push kids through the classrooms so that they can bring more kids in, which to them equals more money. Well that’s all fine and dandy until you start pushing my kid to do something more then what she’s doing. I think she’s doing great, her pediatrician agrees. The end. I don’t need someone with an associate’s degree in child development to tell me what she thinks about my child whom I carried in my belly for 38 ½ weeks, delivered after 9 hours of labor, then nursed, cuddled, loved, cared for, and worried about round the clock by me for the last 2 yrs and 8 months.

Am I being defensive? Yes. Will I be setting up a time to speak with her current teacher? Yes. If that doesn’t work, will I be speaking to the director to figure out what their exact beliefs are on potty training? You bet.

*UPDATED* This post was written on Friday but never posted. I did speak with her current teacher this afternoon and she shares my views on potty training. Yay! She mentioned twice that she felt Olivia is actually doing very well with potty training in spite of still being fairly young. Hallaleujah...

Why Pray?

I grew up in a family that held hands and gave thanks at the dinner table (and not just on special occasions), around a mother and grandmothers that found their strength in prayer and faith, with a family that believed our lives were guided by God and that he always knew best….no matter what. Anytime life threw us a curveball, the adults would simply say “we’ll pray about it”. So I became an adult that prays over life’s challenges, over my marriage, my children; I’ve prayed for guidance on major life decisions, and I’ve put all my faith in God guiding me in the direction He wants me to go.

So why is it that I am sometimes reluctant to pray over certain things? I’ve seen God’s hand in just about every aspect of my life. I know He is there. But, when I want something that I think isn’t good for me, or not what God would want, I find myself almost refusing prayer. One of the hardest things to do is to pray for God’s will and truly mean it. {Especially when you’re a control freak like me.} I mean we all have our own ideas about what our lives should look like, but when you can hand it over to someone who knows all, sees all, created you, and has a special plan for you-- there is no greater feeling. Who better to be in control of your life?

So why do I hesitate to pray? Why are there things in my life that have been neglected? I’ll just say I’ve ignored a certain aspect of my life lately, hoping the problems would go away on their own. Why I chose not to just pray about it, I’m not sure. I think I already had my mind made up as to how it should all play out, and I was refusing to let God take over. I guess there comes a point when some of us have to realize the more we have to fight for control in a situation, the more the situation is actually controlling us. So as I sit here typing, I’m preparing myself to surrender……….AGAIN.